Ahhh!!! After Ten Thousand Years I’m Finally Free!!!

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ritaWait! Don’t yet gather five teenagers with attitude because I just finished working with my master degree application and now my little documents are on their way to Europe. At least now I can start fooling around again. Then again please DO gather five teenage girls with attitude.

red

RED!

Are you expecting pink? Too bad! It's BLUE!

Were you expecting pink? Too bad! It’s BLUE!

yellow

Yello- err… BLONDE!

Seriously-lacking-in-racist-joke BLACK!

Seriously-lacking-in-racist-joke BLACK!

PINK!(?)

PINK!(?)

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My Berserk Button Was Really Pushed by Bullshit Zodiac Talk

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Long story short, basically one of my coworkers was talking about how she just realized why she had been feeling down a few days earlier. The explanation she brought up was some bullshit about how her zodiac was hiding behind moon or some stupid shit like that. She was very proud with her explanation and I, without realizing it, had my temper reached the point of no return. When I left the office pantry to go back to work, I spontaneously shouted ‘BULLSHIT!’ It was a good thing that most of the people in that pantry thought I was just joking with my ‘antic’ and only a couple realized that I was truly angry back then.

To make this article more pleasant to the eyes, I will decorate it with pics of beautiful and cute girls

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Touhou 13.5: ‘Hopeless Masquerade’ Is Announced

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Oh, Haruhi! My pants feel so wet right now!

This one is another fighting game from Tasogare Frontier. After the massive disappointment called Ten Desires, this one seems perfect for me! Add the fact that Tasofro finally got rid of the annoying weather system. If they make Parsee, Satori, and Kaguya playable, I will be the happiest man on earth.

 

Music Time! Green-Eyed Jealousy

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Brooding, melancholic, and depressing type of music is something one won’t commonly associate with the Touhou series. ZUN’s works usually either try to convey the feeling of Japanese mysticism or upbeat battle between girls in frilly clothes. However the eleventh entry to the Touhou series decided to break the routine and started a new trend not with one but TWO musics with heart-rending atmosphere. They are ‘Green-Eyed Jealousy’ and ‘Satori Maiden~ Third Eye’. The latter has become one of representatives of ZUN’s music as one can see from the myriad remixes and arrangements and is I personally consider as the theme music for the whole Chireiden group in SA yet the former has not yet reached the same height as Satori Maiden… and it fits well with the whole theme of the music.

Green-Eyed Jealousy is the battle theme of Mizuhashi Parsee, one of the rare tragic characters in a ensemble cast full of tea-drinking, frill-waving, silly hat-wearing overpowered girls. She’s a youkai who guards the bridge to former hell with dominion over jealousy due to her tragic past life. ZUN is not shy exposing her weakness through the music because you can instantly be overwhelmed by the tide of tragedy despite the cheery dialogue leading to the battle. Just like one of Parsee’s moves, Green-Eyed Jealousy is a monster yet many tend to overlook it because of its status as a second stage theme. While ‘Kappa of Ryuunosuke Akutegawa~ Candid Friend’ manage to enjoy great popularity thanks to its length and upbeat theme despite being a third stage theme, Green-Eyed Jealousy will, just like our dear Mizuhashi Parsee, sulk in jealousy towards the other themes. It’s pitiful because I’m certain those who listened heartily to the theme will definitely agree that it’s a rare find of green-glistening emerald among petals of sakura. Mizuhashi Parsee, despite being only a second stage boss with little exposure, is one of my favorite Touhou characters and nothing represents her more than a simple heart-rending music to accompany the danmaku battle.

My Favorite Anime this Season: Mankind Has Declined

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With the end of summer season, I found myself quite mesmerized and surprised by how this simple series has managed to leave me feeling all warm and melancholic. It’s a kind of feeling I have long known about; it’s the feeling of parting with a masterpiece. For me, knowing a series is a good series is the most apparent when I have to close the last page or watch the last episode’s credit after the whole journey. Mediocre series leaves me exhausted for having to go through all the effort despite no matter how entertaining it was, good series leaves me agitated and high-spirited because I’ve just enjoyed a good solid entertainment medium, however a masterpiece leaves me a taste of melancholy akin to the feeling a person has when he or she does not wish to part with a close friend. It doesn’t matter whether the tone of the ending is happy or sad or the medium it is conveyed in. It could be a movie, novels, animu, mango, or video games; in the end my initial emotional response after the whole experience determines whether it can be considered bad, mediocre, good or a personal masterpiece.

That is how I know the series called ‘Mankind Has Declined’ or Jintai for short is an instant masterpiece. Despite its simple delivery, lacking in orgasmic animation or special effects, it truly delivers solid entertainment. The story basically tells how in the future humans have dwindled in numbers and those left behind are trying either to rebuild societies or just keep on living with their daily lives. At the same time, creatures known as fairies began to appear. This little fellas are considered as the ‘present-humans’ and hold strange powers and technology allowing them to create items that seemingly work in unnatural and illogical manner. Our main character is a girl (whose name remains disclosed through the series) who works as a mediator between the humans and fairies. It originates from a light novel of the same name. Now, I usually dismiss most LN-based anime adaptation because of shallow most of them are. However I became intrigued when first learnt the author is none other than Tanaka Romeo, the genius who brought us Kana Imouto, Kazoku Keikaku, Yume Miru Kusuri, Cross Channel and I/O.

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The Worst PR Stunt of the Year in Anime Industry and Is It Worth It?

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For a couple of days, I hadn’t had time to access the usual animu & mango boards I frequent to for some reason and another so I was quite curious when I first learned about the fiasco involving Silver Link, mainly the staffs of Kokoro Connect, and a B-grade seiyuu (or just call it VA for short) named Mitsushiro Ichiki. Of course I feel obligated to give summary of what happened to those of you have been living under the rock like me. First, yes, the dinosaurs are extinct already so we’re safe to go out now and second, this is probably the best (worst?) possible matchup of your typical ‘PR stunts gone bad’ with typical ‘internet hate machine’ we know and love. Basically this, Silver Link’s PR team for some reason or another decided to pull a prank on a not-so-famous VA named Mitsushiro Ichiki. It’s something they consider funny and believe would boost their rating [citation needed] but definitely will not bite them back in the ass. So with all their wisdom and total lack of ass insurance, about two months ago in June, slightly before the airing of the TV series, they offered Ichiki an audition for a role as an anime original character. For this, they prepared rough sketch of what supposed to be the ‘character design’ of said character complete with dialogue lines for Ichiki to read (mainly contains embarrassing lines fitting this kind of juvenile prank). They also didn’t forget to tape the whole thing because COMEDY. They also taped more correspondents with him and further details like how he treated his mom for dinner for this joyous occation because HILLARITY. Then they invited Ichiki to a live event, featuring several VAs from the series, to introduce him to NicoNico audience only to tell him that SPOILER: It was all staged all along! Lulz were had among them as they played back all the records and in the end they offered him the job to drive around Japan promoting the anime. There are also stories on how they said that he’s too talentless for the project and should be janitor instead but these are [citation needed]. Fast forward to couple days ago, as we were staying under the rock enjoying whatever detritus was available, Ichiki made a guest appearance in Tomokazu Sugita’s (Kyon, Gintoki, the guy who I wish would narrate my life along with the Wakamoto) radio show and told him the story (because the story was relatively obscure at that point) and Sugita himself was not amused. After that the internet RAGEs, boycotts were called, the other VA’s twitter are harassed, and everybody live happily ever after.

As happy as Moko-tan here

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Why Kurubiyutei Gankyo is my Favorite Glasses Girl

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Through my whole ‘career’ an anime fan, I have never once encountered a meganekko (glasses girl) I genuinely like. For some reason, I don’t find glasses as much of a turn-on to me and girls with glasses are usually trapped in certain archetypes that are simply bore me to inception. They are either shy class rep type (the Iinchou from Seto no Hanayome), tsundere strict class rep type (Honami from Rental magica), fujoshi otaku type (Fuji Yoshi from SZS) or the silent type (Nagato Yuki from Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuutsu). It’s as if glasses are ice coffins that guarantee to mold your character into set archetype. That is why I never comprehend the logic behind their attraction. There’s also the fact that technically glasses are nothing more than accessories and said traits can still apply perfectly on non-glasses girls. It’s not much a defining trait and appears as stickers on pre-designed character. In fact, one of the main moe points a man can expect from meganekko is the moment when they TAKE OFF their glasses! I mean, what kind of moe point is that if the best part is when they lose the point?

No! I don’t understand you!

However the world is huge and there is always first time for everything and this season I found my first genuine affection towards one meganekko, Kuribiyutei Gankyo from Kumeta’s nonsensical Joshiraku.

Miss Cool Beauty Glasses, thespian

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Yes, You Only Live Once so Stop Saying YOLO!

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I can’t deny that I’m getting old. I hail from the generation of Gamefaqs and Albino Blacksheep and from an era when we accessed Newgrounds just to play them ‘hentai’ games. Even back then, silly catchphrases and fads (or memes as they now call it) have existed around the internet and many experts can assure you that such things predate the existence of the web, Jesus, and dinosaurs. We all still remember when ‘all your base are belong to us’ was still funny and its tragedy of being beaten to death and finally vanished into obscurity. And I still remember how cakes are always miserable piles of lies and we all used to be an adventurer until we met vision-impaired archers that can only target certain part of our body. Notice that the last few examples are considered ‘newer’ on the net compared to Zero Wings and teh lulz. Yet I found all of them to be amusing even if in the end they all met the tragic end of being overused more than an overpriced Tenga. However there is something (call it meme, fad, trend, or Richard Dawkins if you like) that I just can’t stomach from its conception and that is YOLO.

To help me quell my rage, here’s a picture of Yamada Aoi

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Music Time! Nippon Egao Hyakkei

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This song is the ending theme of Joshiraku, anime adaptation of manga of the same title authored by the genius behind Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei, Kouji Kumeta, and animated by… ugh, JC Staff. The full version of the song will be available on September but I just want to post the loop here because… well, you know once you’ve listened to it.

Basically the music can be summarized in the following sentence:

Jugemu Jugemu
Gokō-no surikire
Kaijarisuigyo-no
Suigyōmatsu Unraimatsu Fūraimatsu
Kuunerutokoro-ni Sumutokoro
Yaburakōji-no burakōji
Paipopaipo Paipo-no-shūringan
Shūringan-no Gūrindai
Gūrindai-no Ponpokopī-no Ponpokonā-no
Chōkyūmei-no Chōsuke
And now for your personal orgasm.

Rewatching My-HiME and Drooling and Lamenting Over Natsuki Kuga

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Perfect

Okay, so I just spent the past couple of days watching Sunrise’s classic pseudo-magical-girl half-hearted-yuri-paradise My-HiME anime. One lustrum has passed yet I found a long-forgotten waifu material that flew over my mind five years ago since I only just realized it now. She’s Natsuki fucking Kuga, that’s who! She has everything I consider as ideal waifu traits. Long black (blue?) hair, slender body, pair of ideal breasts that is not too humongous yet not as flat as English beer, sporty with attitude, slightly tsundere yet not Kugimiya Rie-level of overkill, and an overall aura of badassness. At the same time I realized this anime has a massive waste of ideal female traits and that also happens to be the same Natsuki fucking Kuga! Five years have passed and it’s just now I realized what has been haunting me in this half decade life of mine (at least concerning this series) and that night mare takes the form of lilies… metaphoric lilies… Yes, I’m talking about them LESBIAAAAAANSSSSS!!!

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